Dear Christopher......

Dear Christopher-Derek,

First of all, I'm really sorry I gave you a dreadfully long name. And I also kind of wish I gave you my last name because, well, its better.  But you know, I was 15 at the time when I picked it out.  So can you blame me?  But I will promise that when your older and having kids of your own, hopefully you'll be at least 25, I won't make fun of any of the names you pick out for your kids. Deal?

But I just wanted to tell you how much of a pain in the ass you can be.  Its already bad enough your turning 6 this summer and you make me feel super duper old.  But man don't you annoy the crap out of me!

I love you an all that good stuff, but man the more you test my authority...The more I yell. And when I tell you to clean your room....Clean it.  For hell's sake just do what I tell you in general!  I promise you I'll be a nicer person if you do.

Oh and stop slacking and do your homework. Why on hell kindergartners have homework is BEYOND me, but just do it. And don't complain to me or I'll make your sister beat you up.  And we both know that she can. And it's hilarious when she does and I'll post that shit on Facebook. =D

Love you!

-Mom